Damned and Divine

So this series of dreams ive been having. Where to begin. This is all going to play out like fiction because it sounds alot like it:

It started one night with a dream about a boy, which isnt unusual, but something about this dream certainly was unusual. We met at a Nightwish concert i believe (not that unusual for my dreams considering its one of the places id like most to be and have never been) moshing along together, and instantly connected, i believe several hours after the concert was spent making out. Not much else happened that night, i just remember that he looked like a younger version of the guitarist from Escape the Fate, Bryan Monte and was very much similar to me in personality, which worked well.

I thought nothing of it, just another dream about the boy im never going to meet, except something was different. All day i kept thinking about him, and even wondered what he was up to at the moment while i was in my university lecture, and how i couldnt wait to see him when i got home. Id spend 15 minutes at a time thinking like this before i realised that he wasn’t real, it was a dream, but for some reason memories and emotions of him had leaked into my wakeful consciousness. I remembered what he spoke like, i could feel what it was like to hug him, and i remembered the taste of his lips.

I dreamt again of him the following night, we spent all day in this dream under a tree by the lake at my university, talking, getting to know each other better, and making plans for the future, what we were going to get up to. Now this is where it gets even more intense because the night after that, we carried out those plans, my dreams actually crossed over. These dreams still happen most nights, and in all of them im completely in control of my actions, what i say, everything, im living two lives and sometimes i dont know which is real. When im sitting in class when im awake, and i think of him, it feels as if im supposed to be somewhere, he needs me, but hes not real. Id drop this life for my dream life in a second though, but that goes without saying i guess, a parallel life where everything is the same for me except ive found my soulmate (and apparently get to go to nightwish concerts quite often), yes please.

God damn, its days/weeks/months/existences like these that im thankful Nightwish exists and i can cling to them and their music (as well as Tarja on her own). The following lyrics from Sleeping Sun is exactly how i feel, to the letter.

“I wish for this night-time to last for a lifetime. The darkness around me, shores of a solar sea. Oh how I wish to go down with the sun,  sleeping, weeping, with you.”

Sleeping Sun from End of an Era.

.

Sleeping Sun from Rock Werchter (Anette!)

I also added Anette singing sleeping sun because i really love her now, and she deserves our appreciation just as much as Tarja and people who say things like “Shes a stupid slut” and “Cant sing to save her life” fucking piss me off like you would not believe, she can fucking sing you dumb fucks, shes just not a classical singer, and i dont see how shes a stupid slut for getting an amazing opportunity to join a world famous band and taking it. To quote her blog “I am Anette, not Tarja, and I do as good as I can. I sing the way I do and I am the way I am!” Well said girl and im glad you’re not letting those ignorant fucks in the audience who for some reason scream out Tarja’s name get you down anymore (Not sure why i said that like i was saying it to her haha…). Fuck people who think they’re a true Tarja fan because they hate on Anette like that, do they really think Tarja would condone that? Of course she wouldn’t, im sure she has no hard feelings towards Anette whatsoever because Anette has never said a wrong word about Tarja and vice-versa. Anyway, that little rant will be dealt with in a videoblog i plan to do one day.

Tata for now! I have to be off to bed, have to be up at 5:30am for my 8am lecture on Speech Pathology Professionalism or something.

So i haven’t posted in like forever (7 days or something).

I just dont have much to post about, the only thing i can think of posting about is the distinct lack of exciting things happening to me its all uni exams this and work that.

Maybe ill update you on a combined friends 18th i went to on the weekend, was quite exciting/interesting, yea infact i will, tomorrow on my day off =) (By day off i mean i cant be bothered going to classes).

And that odd dream i mentioned awhile ago, is still going on, it continues every night as if it were a 2nd life.

Anyway, here’s a cute picture. Who says grown finnish metal musicians can’t have some bromance?

Its guy love, between two guys.

… was the topic of today’s Neuroscience lecture! Which i love. I would love love to do Psychological Science next year and major in neuroscience and do honours and all that but, i fear for my job opporunities and i really dont want to end up still working at Woolworths after a 5 year bachelors degree with honours and $30,000 or so dollars in student loans. So, ive decided i shall continue with my Speech Pathology degree, since they are in short supply and have been for years and are estimated to be for years to come (Side stastic, from memory i think the told us that 1 in 4 people will need to see a Speech Pathologist in their lifetime in Australia, and theres only sometime like 5000 registered speech pathologists, out of like 400 people at Brisbane Grammar that need Speech Pathology, our lecturer is only there for 45 minutes a month or something crazy like that, anyway, tl;dr better chance of getting the job i want) and hopefully when i graduate i can eventually get into Traumatic Brain Injury involving Language disorders, so like post-tbi rehabilitation, considering thats where my interest lies. I think ill enjoy dealing with physiological disorders rather than functional ones (unknown cause, mostly in kids).

Today kind of gave me a slight phobia of a closed head injury from a car crash haha, i think im over it now but i freaked out and was like HOLY CRAP DOES MY CAR HAVE AIRBAGS? Turns out it doesnt but ill just rely on my seatbelt if some asshole decides to stop suddenly in front of me. I like my brain free of lesions, and would prefer not to have frontal coup and secondary contra coup bruising from direct brain contact with internal Dura matter. Lol sorry, i sound pretentious, honeslty ive only scratched the surface of all this, but i know so much more now than i did when i started this degree, i just dont realise it until i write it down. Neuroscience isnt something that comes up in general conversation often… especially since i dont have any friends from that course, or any of my courses (/sad violin).

We also did open brain injury, a perfect example of which is the guy in Australia shot 34 times in the head with a nail gun, picture related. He did not survive obviously, but there was a man shot 5 times who did walk away, after months of physical therapy of course. I should really get rid of or at least suppress my sick sense of humour before i actually start dealing with these cases right?

http://au.news.yahoo.com/a/-/latest/5519929/man-shot-34-times-head-nail-gun/

Anyways, relatively alot has been happening this weekend, infact its been fairly social! Also i had  a dream on Thursday night that shook me up alot for days which  will get to talking about in another post. Oh and i also got a car which im picking up/signing papers for this week, my first car, should have my license in a few weeks as well, exciting stuff!

So lets begin with Friday. I was supposed to have work 1:30-3:30 but my shift was cancelled without me being notified for the 4th week in a row (Luckily a co-worker called me on Thursday night wanting to change a shift and asked me if i could work Friday for her and i was like but im already working Friday and she was like gah they must have changed shit around again anyway back into Friday) so i mulled around allday, then went to the movies with friends in the evening to see Xmen Origins: Wolverwine which was acceptable. I wore black jeans, black t-shirt and a black leather jacket, smooth right?

Saturday i had work from 11:30-6:00, i got a text midway through the day asking me to come round to a friends place for drinks with some people from my old school crew, so i went there at about 9:00 with Breige, did many shots, danced to Britney Spears as is customary for i and her, then Kara went at my hair with a GHD (which a photo will be posted below,  it was like 1am this morning though and ive slept on it early this morning and this afternoon so its gone wavier, im going to go over it again with my straightener in the morning before Uni). So then Breige left along with the few other girls there, leaving just us guys. So we watched Sex-Drive unrated version, love that movie, then i went to bed with Robert in a single bed which is fucked and sinks in the middle and tries to swallow you like some chasm from hell so we spent the entire night fighting to stay not on top of each other, when the sun came up i gave up on sleep and proceeded home where i had a shower and went kaplunk on my bed for a few hours.  So yea hecticness!

Im staying on the Gold Coast this week since i have to pick up my car and sign the paperwork and such, no early morning on Wednesday anymore because Spch1100 tutes aren’t on anymore and we have a Monday lecture at 2pm instead for the rest of the semester which is awesome because otherwise id be waiting for Linguistics to start at 4pm and doing nothing.

Plans for my hair are coming along nicely as well. I found a better salon in Brissy that does the proper 100% authentic Japanese Bio-Ionic straightening process, i went in when i was shopping with Paige last Wednesday and got a quote. The guy was very very knowledgeable about the processes and i could tell hes done it alot, in fact he was doing one while i was there haha. So he looked through my hair at its healthiness and length and thickness and such and told me that since i have virgin hair (never coloured it or anything) the straightening will take much better and be easier to apply, so he quoted me $400 since my hair is just long enough to get it done, and they usually start at $600 for like female long hair. So $400 sounds reasonable to me, considering the other place said $500 and they were shit and using a fake product. So once i pay my car insurance and have some spare cash ill go back and find out how much the regrowth touch ups are etc. then make an appointment and get it done. Mum said i look like 2 years older with straight hair haha so thats a plus (as long as its only 2 years). Can’t believe how much of a coincidence it was that i found the place, they are on like Adelaide street i think and its just a small door and staircase leading to the salon, and i saw the sign advertising bio-ionics outside and i was like checking that out!

Peace hombres! Until sometime this week, much love!

My hair straightened. (I know you have no contrast yet
so you dont know what its like when its curly but, maybe one day =P)

So i do a course called “Linguistics: The Structure of Words and Sentences” at the moment, and my lecture on monday was partly about Semantic Language Extension so like when a words meaning changes over time. One of the examples she used was the word “Gay’ which as we all know has changed from meaning ‘happy’ to meaning ‘happy’ and ‘homosexual’ to meaning just ‘homosexual’ and now ‘homosexual’ and ‘pathetic’ (or just negative connotations, ie. “That’s so Gay!”). I didn’t know this but it also has had ALOT more meanings, and this is just a few:

• In 1896 the US slang expression ‘get gay’ meant to show off.
• 1637 was the first use of gay to mean ‘addicted to social pleasures and dissipation’.
• Following on from the previous one, in 1800’s gay was adapted to apply to a woman to mean a prostitute.

I knew it had a few meanings, but i didn’t know about any of those haha.

Tarja ‘Getting Gay’ in Concert.

So today was pretty chill, ive been having trouble getting out of bed for uni see, so i tried this new thing called going to bed earlier, anyway it kind of worked, my alarm went off at 7:20 as its supposed to so i can catch the 8:27 train (i like having time to get ready and eat breakfast at a reasonable pace while watching an episode of Rocko’s Modern Life which if you weren’t a kid in the 90’s was this awesome Australian kids cartoon about a talking wallaby and his crazy adventures with his cow friend Heffer. It has so many sexual connotations and unsaid things that only older people get so its still good now, anyway moving on) so yea it went off at 7:20, and i went back to bed with the mindset of “Well ill lay down for another 10 minutes with my eyes open adjusting to being awake” anyway someone getting out of bed upstairs woke me up at 7:45 and i was like shiiiit have to hurry, so ran for the shower in my underwear (luckily i was the only one downstairs since everyone else’s bedrooms are upstairs) so i get to the shower, turn it on and jump in, only problem is the person waking up that woke me up was Rick and we both jump for the shower as soon as we wake up, so hes in the shower upstairs and for some reason it overwrites the downstairs hot water, i conceded defeat and let him shower first. Its coming into winter here so it was freezing when i stepped out >.<

Next up: Weet-bix and the simpsons this morning instead of Rocko. Get to the train station which is just next door as the train pulls up, perfect timing. Anyway had Intro to Psyc: Physiological and Cognitive Psyc today, tute was v. good, did a fun experiment thing, and the lecture was on attention & memory which was also good. Came home, made a canned spaghetti on toast lunch and have been listening to music and doing some work the rest of today. Stupid weather foiled my washing plans though, after id washed all of my towels (meaning i have no others to dry myself with until they’re dry) it decided “Lol i think ill go overcast now so Reece has to drip dry.”

Plans for tonight? Hmm more work hopefully (or World of Warcraft with my brother if i get distracted), organising dinner since Fae is out, Pizza maybe? And then sleep early for tomorrow. Speech disorders tute in the morning then going to the city with Paige to see The Boy in the Stripped Pajamas and get lunch.

What i listened to today:
On the way to uni: Wisdom of Wind – Tarja, Half of Century Child.
In between tute and lecture: Some tracks from The Classical Conspiracy which Epica just released on the 9th of this month (which i will hopefully be reviewing on Thursday/Friday)
On the way back here: Some Tarot tracks then half of Dark Passion Play.
While here: Most of The Divine Conspiracy, a few more tracks from The Classical Conspiracy, For the Sake of Revenge (Sonata Arctica’s live DVD/CD) and now im listening to Soilwork’s album Stabbing the Drama.

My face when my shower suddenly became ice cold.

Well there probably won’t be anything actually on here until Thursday when i get back to the Gold Coast and have some free time so, hang tight Of course my first post had to be in English and Finnish because i love the language so much =D If only i had the spare time to learn it… maybe one day, hopefully my neuralplasticity hasn’t degenerated too much by then haha.

(No ei todennäköisesti ole mitään itse täällä vasta torstaina, kun saan takaisin Gold Coast ja on jonkin verran vapaa-aikaa niin, hengaile tiukka. Tietenkin minun ensimmäinen viesti oli pitänyt olla Englanti ja Suomi, koska rakastan kieltä paljon = D Jos vain minulla oli vapaa-aika oppia se … ehkä jonain päivänä, toivottavasti minun neuralplasticity ei ole synnyttäneet liikaa sitten haha.)

Tarja Stressing Out,  much like i am about my Psychological Research Methodology Research Report due soonish.